saturday, oso and i woke up bright and early to participate in a a 5k run for a catholic high school in santa monica. it's oso's alumni school. i was able to keep up with oso, running next to him at his pace for the first mile in which we finished together with a time of 10:24.

i felt like everyone was going so fast! oso said it was actually pretty slow for him but he was going slower so i could keep up. a little after that, I fell behind and ran at my slower pace and eventually ended up walking for the rest of the 2nd mile. i finished the 2nd mile with a time of 25:18. the duration of the 3rd mile for me was a mix of running and walking. i was so tired, huffing and puffing, feeling all out of shape. every time i saw that grandpa or mother with stroller or little girl passing by me, i'd force myself to outrun them thinking, " i can't finish behind them. i can't. i can't be slower than grandpa!" and every time i neared an intersection with a waiting car, i'd purposely go faster to catch up with a group of others ahead of me so that the waiting cars would have a chance to go before others behind me closed the gap.

when i saw the finishing line and the crowd cheering us on, i picked up my pace and finished with a time of 36:11. i didn't do great, but at least i finished it! it was my second 5k run. i remember the first one i ran last year was for the revlon breast cancer fundraiser and i had been able to keep pace with oso at the time. i guess since then, i've gotten much more out of shape. surprisingly, oso only finished about 6 minutes ahead of me this time. he said he could normally do it in about 25 minutes.

i was so sore later that day. we both got back to my place, took a shower and went straight to bed for a power nap. when i woke up, it hurt to move. my entire body ached.

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the next day, we woke up early and went on a 2.5 hour (approximately 6 mile) hike up in sycamore canyon. we took one of our friends to prep her for her trip to peru since she'll be going on a 4 day hike there.

i was still really sore and thus this hike was really hard for me. i ended up being the straggler. oso was way ahead and our friend was in the middle. we had huge gaps between all of us. there was this one part were the climb is fairly steep and rocky. i could only take 4 or five steps before i'd have to rest because i literally had no more strength left in my thighs to go further. i was even on all fours to help myself climb higher. i imagined myself to be smeagol from lord of the rings.

part of what kept me going was pretending i was part of a survivor from a plane crash and i had to go for help in order to save my injured loved ones...kinda like what happened in "alive" the movie i mentioned a few entries ago. wait? did i mention it? i can't remember anymore. anyway, it helped. the other part of me was like, "you can do it. you gotta show oso you can do it!" and then there's the part of me that's telling me, "you gotta do it because you need to lose that belly pudge that's looking more and more like a pregnant belly!" i can't even fit into a lot of my clothes that i could fit in a year ago. it's so depressing.

how is it that one can so easily start to let themselves go after being in a long-term relationship? both of us have gained weight, though not to the point where we'd be considered "heavy" yet, but if we continue on with physical inactivity, i wouldn't be surprised a year from now to officially be labeled "pudgy." it's now or never to start shedding those 15 lbs i've put on. i'm assuming it's 15 lbs now rather than the 10lbs from a few months ago. i'm too scared to find out for sure so i don't dare weigh myself. i'll wait until i can fit in my clothes comfortably again.